Through treatment, pregnancy and loss: where workplace support matters
Baby Loss Awareness Week (9–15 October) is an opportunity to recognise the impact of pregnancy and baby loss, and the support people may need - including at work. Conversations about family-friendly workplaces often begin with parental leave, but support can be needed much earlier.
Pregnancy loss is common, yet it can remain largely invisible. As many as 1 in 3 women in Australia will experience miscarriage,¹ but many people still struggle to talk about it openly, particularly at work.
At work, there may be no obvious language for what someone is going through. A person may take sick leave, return and try to keep moving forward. From the outside, life can look much the same, even when their experience is very different.
No two family-building journeys look the same. For some, the path may include pregnancy loss, infertility or fertility treatment; for others, it may take a different shape entirely.
Each positive pregnancy test can bring hope; each loss can bring grief. Fertility treatment may add appointments, procedures, uncertainty and repeated disappointment. Meanwhile, life continues: friends announce pregnancies, colleagues take parental leave, and other families grow. It is possible to feel happy for others while also being reminded of what is not happening in your own life.
Experiences like these highlight why workplace support needs to recognise not only the arrival of a child, but the uncertainty, treatment and loss that may come before it. Speaking more openly can help others feel less alone - and make it easier for them to speak openly too. I know this because parts of this journey have been my own.
Workplaces often support the outcome, but not the journey
Most organisations have policies that recognise the arrival of a child. Far fewer acknowledge the uncertainty, treatment and loss that can come before it.
For someone experiencing miscarriage, the impact can include grief, physical recovery, medical appointments and difficult conversations, sometimes all at once. Yet many people feel pressure to return to work quickly or explain an intensely personal experience to access support.
In Australia, the minimum entitlement for miscarriage before 20 weeks is two days of compassionate leave. It covers both the person who experienced the loss and their partner. While that recognition matters, grief, recovery and follow-up care rarely fit neatly into a two-day window.
For someone navigating fertility treatment, the challenge can stretch across months or years. Treatment rarely fits around standard working hours. Appointments, tests, procedures and waiting periods become part of everyday life, often hidden from colleagues and managers.
Without dedicated fertility leave or genuine flexibility, employees may use annual leave, draw down sick leave where it applies, or offer explanations they would rather keep private. Partners may need time too, to attend appointments, provide care and take part in decisions.
A thoughtful policy gives people practical options without requiring them to share intimate medical details with every manager. Fertility treatment is rarely a single appointment or a predictable path. Workplace support should reflect that.
How family-building shapes careers
These experiences are part of a broader conversation about gender equality at work.
The 100% Project’s Breaking Dad research cited ABS data showing that women continue to carry a disproportionate share of caring responsibilities: 93.5% of primary parental leave in the non-public sector (2018–19) was taken by women, and women spent almost three times as much time caring for children each day as men.
This imbalance shapes careers in ways that are often invisible. It influences who applies for opportunities, who feels able to take on a new role, and who pauses or redirects their career to accommodate family responsibilities.
For someone hoping to have a child, a promotion or new role can raise uncomfortable questions: Will I lose eligibility for paid parental leave? Could this affect our future family plans? Is now the wrong time to move?
When policies rely on lengthy service requirements or leave people uncertain about their entitlements, staying put can feel like the safest option - even when someone is ready to progress.
Family planning and career planning can become deeply interconnected, yet many workplaces still treat them as separate.
If we want care to be shared more equally, workplace support must extend to all parents and caregivers, not just mothers. But policies alone will not shift who feels able to use that support.
Beyond policies: creating psychological safety
Policies matter, but so does whether people feel safe using them.
Earlier research from The 100% Project reinforces this point. A 2019 study on [1] Leadership Styles and Gender Imbalance found that adaptive leadership was more strongly associated with organisational cultures supportive of gender equality than transformational or transactional leadership. In practice, the right policies must be matched by leaders who make it safe for people to raise difficult experiences and ask for what they need.
Psychological safety is characterised in Breaking Dad as a workplace climate of mutual respect and trust where people feel comfortable being themselves and safe taking interpersonal risks. Research cited in the paper shows that when psychological safety is present, people are more likely to speak up and less fearful of negative consequences for their self-image, status or career. 2
The paper’s own study of 310 Australian men found that those in psychologically safe workplaces reported being more likely to request family-friendly arrangements, and reported lower levels of gender role conflict.
They were less worried about how others would perceive them and less fearful of negative consequences arising from their choices.
For employees navigating fertility treatment or pregnancy loss, the practical lesson is that offering a policy may not be enough. Employers also need to create an environment in which people can speak up about what they need without fearing judgement or damage to their careers.
That might look like a manager offering flexibility without demanding a detailed explanation. It might mean dedicated fertility leave. It might mean recognising pregnancy loss as a significant life event rather than something that can be processed over a couple of days.
What employers can do
Offer leave for pregnancy loss and fertility treatment that doesn’t require sharing medical detail with every manager
Train managers to offer flexibility first and ask for explanations second
Review service requirements that make people feel unable to move roles
Extend support to partners and all caregivers
Recognising the whole journey
Family-building journeys do not always follow the expected timeline. They may include miscarriage, recurrent loss, secondary infertility or unsuccessful fertility treatment, and not every journey ends with the arrival of a child.
These experiences are more common than many workplaces realise, even if they are rarely discussed openly.
When we think about family-friendly workplaces, we should think beyond parental leave alone. We should consider the full journey, including fertility treatment, pregnancy loss, caregiving responsibilities and the career decisions that surround them.
If this post has brought anything up for you, support is available through the following organisations:
Red Nose Grief and Loss: Call 1300 308 307 (available 24/7) for free telephone and online support following pregnancy or infant loss.
Pink Elephants Pregnancy Loss Helpline (delivered by PANDA): Call 1300 726 306 (Monday–Friday 9 am–7:30 pm, Saturday and public holidays 9 am–4 pm AEST) for 1:1 phone and LiveChat counselling.
Pregnancy, Birth and Baby: Call 1800 882 436 (7 am to midnight AET, 7 days a week) to speak with a maternal child health nurse.
Griefline: Telephone and online counselling for grief and loss.
Lifeline: Call 13 11 14 (24/7) for general crisis support.
13YARN: Call 13 92 76 for culturally safe support for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples.
References
Pink Elephants Support Network. https://www.pinkelephants.org.au/page/131/understanding-miscarriage
Breaking Dad: Psychological safety and more time at home for men. The 100% Project. https://www.the100percentproject.com.au/research/breaking-dad
